"Unsaid Is Okay"

By: Zach Wood

Psalm 141:3

Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips.

 

 

A couple of months ago, I wrote a devotional about a situation I had with a lady at my workplace.  I let some things fly out of my mouth and I wished I had never reacted like I did.  Sometimes, we just say things we really regret saying.  It's not always a slip of a curse word, but it can just be a slip of our attitude and saying things that don't need to be said.  Since then, I am grateful to report, that we get along much better now.  Yes, I get annoyed from time to time about our conversations, but that's just part of having human relationships.  If we never got annoyed with people, we wouldn't be human.  So, I'm thankful that I've established more of a pleasant relationship with my co-worker.  We can laugh and joke about things now.  

 

For the past couple of months, I've thought more and more about things I say and when I say them.  However, what I need to think about more is what not to say in times when I want to say something.  This happens to all of us.  It's very important to know what to say and how to say it.  But, there are also times when we just need to keep our mouths shut!  No matter whether you're a child, an adolescent, a young adult, or grown adult, there are many times when we need to just refrain from speaking at all.  I've read this passage quite a few times from the book of Psalm and I'm touched by the words.  I think we all need to ask the Lord to put a guard over our mouths for times when we just feel the need to "add" to a situation.  There are times when the "addition" need not be there.  It's so hard to keep a tight reign on our tongues and we often end up getting ourselves into a load of trouble by letting them go.  

 

I really like the phrase in the last part of this passage, "keep watch over the door of my lips."  Figuratively speaking, there are times when that door needs to stay locked with a padlock.  Not just a simple lock on the doorknob, but an actual padlock.  And, we need the strength of God to help us not unlock the door to the words we want to say.  Just because we are thinking words, doesn't mean they need to leave the door of our lips.  We can bite our lips and refrain from what might not only hurt others, but also our relationship with them.  I've learned this in a marriage relationship more often than I should have to.  Time after time, I catch myself saying something to my wife that isn't loving, but hurtful.  Then, after it's too late, I think, "wait...that was not loving".  However, the words are gone and I can't get them back.  It's not just with a marriage relationship, but with anyone you know.  

 

We need to learn more that leaving some things unsaid is okay.  Like the old saying, "If you can't say anything good, don't say anything at all."  Whomever came up with that phrase is a very wise person.  So, whether you're a parent talking with your child, a spouse talking to your partner, a child talking to your parent, or a friend talking to a friend, be wise with your words.  Think them through and then consider Proverbs 10:19, "When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise".  Sometimes, it's just better to hold our tongues and not create a forest fire of words.  Remember that sometimes leaving things unsaid is okay.